such sober certainty of waking bliss (wakingbliss) wrote,
such sober certainty of waking bliss


I am suddenly reminded of a time in which I was caught in a terrible jigsaw puzzle. I was a piece that looked like it would fit, but didn't quite have the right shape. I used to be pushed and shoved in an attempt to be forced into this place I didn't belong in.

You hated me a lot more than you let on, but only because I ruined your perfect image. Not necessarily me, but HER. I wasn't proud of her either. I understand. I don't know why I'm thinking of you right now. I think we're on a level now where I'm grown up enough to show my displeasure, and you can acknowledge me, but we get along just fine. You know some of the darkest moments of my life, her life, all of it. You witnessed the acts of betrayal and destruction and you still remember, unlike her. I want to ask you what you saw, but I know you're biased. I know. And her view of it is so distorted...

I want to know the truth. I want to know what REALLY happened. I want you to tell me her story, and even my own. You are one of the few people who knew me in times that I still don't remember. I want your side. And now that I think about it, I grew up under your eyes.

I wonder what you think of me now.
Tags: jigsaw, past
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